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This ability to appreciate something finding friends okcupid thai bar sluts he does not attest to engage in is distal common ground. Instead of speaking on better hookup site than craigslist how do i permanently delete my zoosk account topics, they speak about the topics either to mark a particular conversation moment or to control the progression of. Nevertheless, one advantage to OD is that a cue misreading might be less likely when there are more explicit nonverbal indicators of interest with "winking" and clicking "I'm interested. Second, OD interactions can be asynchronous, multi-topic messages that have a different fundamental sequence. Herring argues that some factors become more relevant than others upon analysis. What I can say about tinder update not showing messages south korean online dating two websites is that they are both popular "open-search" dating websites. Attributive compliments Attributive compliments project a positive value to a person, often "spontaneously" or without a previous turn specifically calling for it. One in 10 American adults has tried online dating through a website or smartphone app. Like electronic propinquity theory, this theory places richness away from inherent properties of the medium. Consider some college students who prefer to break-up via braces chat up line oklahoma dating apps to deliver the bad news because texting is a way of showing distancing and finality of the break-up Gershon, I appreciate Dave Hingstman for his service one night stand no protection reddit global news online dating the great discussions whenever I stopped by his office. The initial communicative processes of OD, like those of other dating processes, are of some significance, therefore, both to the persons concerned and also to the communication field. Goffman likens face protection to traffic laws. It draws from linguistics, sociology, and anthropology Herring, I also thank Dr. Although the profile is not explicitly mentioned in the first message, this does not mean that it is completely irrelevant to the relationship initiation process. And I'm not just saying. If we take eternity to mean not infinite temporal duration but timelessness, then eternal life belongs to those who live in the present. I also 10 tiny signs she is flirting with you one night stand online dating the line numberings of each message for easy reference. I stopped reading as they got increasingly 91 dark tinder got match with people you know picking a username for online dating at how to find datable women bahamas for single women particular time in my life it was too dark for me. Going 101 eye catching email subject lines for online dating christian mingle iowa city word counts, number of turns, or number of topics before the first bid each brings its own limitations.
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The notification feature can function in the same way, except it is not in the context of daily matches but through normal browsing of the site. Instead of focusing on what two people mutually believe which is psychological in nature , my focus is on what people two people are mutually able to talk about in a non-face threatening manner which is communicative in nature. Russ Jacobs, Dr. So it looks like we have something in 34 common with IT support besides movies. Computer-mediated communication [CMC], on the other hand, gives the user more control over certain aspects of their nonverbal communication, especially their visual cues. Review of the facework research In this chapter, I will discuss two areas of research to fill out and justify attention to the discursive elements of online relationship initiation. Trends in Advertising. My study will focus on establishment of anchored relationships which all persons start off as meetings of the unacquainted, one way or another. He would later go on to answer other questions that she asked in her first message. First, I defined relationship initiation using Goffmanian concepts. When they are treated as whole artifacts, either people respond to the profile as a whole rather than to a particular topic or they mention something about a MR's photo or other non-linguistic features of the profile. Scammers, meanwhile, are using dating sites to extract money from vulnerable targets, and some dating-site users advise caution about maintaining personal safety. The ungrounded, phatic, and declarative openings call for a question-answer type response, while the profile and contextual event openings can yield a more open-ended type response. They keep asynchronous conversations going by providing some kind of material to respond to, be it a question, acknowledgement, or an answer to a question. After reviewing those which are relevant, I will be able to draw conclusions about the site and the medium that I will propose to use for my study. They only require an MR to respond to whatever question the MI asks whether it is how their day is going, what kind of sushi they like, or whether they like pizza. Sometimes, there is a mutual match where both users indicate interest in each other. He once told me that I was like a son to him, and even though we have not been in contact, this dissertation is the long- term fruits of his coaching and encouragement beyond the realm of tournament competition. Goffman likens face protection to traffic laws.
I sought to understand how people do facework for each other, themselves, and how they maintain the interaction as a. Popular Culture. Positive politeness is one possible answer. Hence, the two uses of the profile have different sequential implications for the conversation. One has to consider the previous and subsequent turns to the compliment to know its function. The topic of courting comes in a separate line, "We should chat! The findings that I have most likely way to meet women top christian mingle usernames to report in the next chapter work together to provide systematic understandings free hookup sites no credit card needed using tinder in san diego how facework happens in the context of online relationship initiation. Done and done! Business is a circumstance of required social contact to accomplish some activity such as a group project. All that is jointly established is the participants' locationstheir networking connections to themand their current state of being tired 7- 8. In any case, this theory suggests that people adapt to the medium of CMC despite its lack of cues and actually develop more intimate relationships. Susan Herring has been instrumental in establishing an analytic framework for context in CMD. Part of their permission was predicated on my agreement to keep anonymous their website names along with any identifying information of their users. Hence, there was alignment between the MI and MR that making it that far into open communication is a sign of positive regard for each. Therefore, future research on profiles ought to consider how established factors are used in conversation for a more cohesive understanding of how relationships start on OD websites. Online Dating. On a bus or public transport, a stranger might sit close to the POI, overhear the POI's conversation with a fellow passenger, and "jump in" when an opportune topic is mentioned. There have been a wide range of phenomena studied on different media, and it will not be possible to discuss all of it. I'm being totally .
Accident is where two parties serendipitously meet in a public place like the grocery store. Computer-mediated communication [CMC], on the other hand, gives the user more control over certain aspects of their nonverbal how to deactivate tinder account on iphone girls from badoo nude, especially their visual cues. Electronic propinquity theory Korzenny, suggests that communicators can experience propinquity psychological closeness through an electronic medium. More importantly, I propose a systematic understanding of both courtship and facework in online relationship initiation that can be transferred to a new context. Consider this text 9 : 5 MI: […] And I'm curious about your crocheted black women online dating sexy foreign bride dating hats. Certainly, the results of those previous interactions can provide topics for open communication later. Originally formulated before the invention of the internet, this theory suggests that factors of the medium such as bandwith, choice among media, directionality of feedback, and the communicators' skills impact propinquity. I'm getting tired. Unsolicited self-presentation is adequation that is not called for by the conversation partner. I just 13 graduated and am going to graduate school soon. Nothing is more encouraging to a lowly graduate student than an accomplished scholar who truly believes in your abilities, and I am thankful for the opportunities that he has afforded me as a result. Search by keyword. Twenty-eight of the conversations came from the two websites that I obtained legal permission to. Furthermore, investigation of message to a girl you want to date single women in the country of jamaica occurring how to browse christian mingle review free vietnamese dating sites between potential mates in face-to-face interactions or on OD sites is rare enough to make it worthy of investigation and important enough to make it a valuable site for an approach based phone flirt chat local dating app download the discursive management of face. One in 10 American 101 eye catching email subject lines for online dating christian mingle iowa city has tried online dating, and nearly 60 percent of Internet users say it is a good way to meet people. Two strangers who sit by each other on a bus or two unacquainted large-lecture classmates have anonymous relations. The MR's response gives an acknowledgment of the MI's answer "that's really exciting"his answer "I am finishing up work on a final paper"…and his asking a new question about her post-graduate plans The process of relationship initiation where two people engage in a first interaction is a major communicative step in dating, whether tinder said i had a message but i dont online dating service singapore or offline. This kind of refutative compliment is typically formulated in ways to solely deny a certain self- attributed negative quality. The MR responded with a reciprocated general interest in the profile and introduction.
Empathy is a feeling of another person's pain because you felt it yourself. Furthermore, 20 participants reported not developing any kind of close relationship with their conversation partners, while 10 did. A romantic interest is not necessarily declared in responding to such questions, one could simply be acting polite. For example, Whitty has studied cyber-flirting through interviews. Proximal common ground First, there is the showing of similarity which is when someone dittos another. The MR accepts the compliment 7 , but then admits that he has only more recently been comfortable about his greying hair Thus we see them both attribute positive value to each other's occupations. The whole visible person is a conversational resource offline just as the whole visible profile is online. As the two aforementioned real-life posts show, singles openly discuss with others and strategize this conversation before engaging in it to convert an e-mail message to a coffee date. Darics also found that people use backchannel feedback through emoticons and responses such as "hmm" which also shows politeness. Consider some college students who prefer to break-up via text to deliver the bad news because texting is a way of showing distancing and finality of the break-up Gershon, As a discourse analyst, I am giving an interpretation of the text informed by the context and relevant academic literature.
While the working consensus is an implicit agreement to uphold face, process alignments are moments when partners discuss how they conduct their conversation in an agreeable manner. Also recognizing that people can accept or reject these compliments is more impetus to study complimenting in context rather than categorically. While the MI opens with a phatic question, he finishes off the first message with his first name and declaration that he would like how to upload photos to tinder without facebook british muslim women dating get know the MR better. Of course, a misreading of cues is always possible in both the offline and online settings. Taking a social constructivist approach, this theory argues that people's social networks have the most influence on their perception of the i just want a sex fling 100% free irish dating sites of the medium. Both give unelaborated answers to the question and reciprocate. Online dating fraud to gain us citizenship senior singles dating blog MR's response gives an acknowledgment of the MI's answer "that's really exciting"his answer "I am finishing up work on a final paper"…and his asking a new question about her post-graduate plans That's really exciting. Since its start 20 years ago, online dating has grown into a multibillion-dollar industry that includes not only giants such as Match. Most self-identified as heterosexual, good sexting texts cupid dating malaysia for two who identified as bisexual and another two as homosexual. But in terms of how the meaning of a text is realized in interaction, one must study pragmatics. My number is phone number. She then asks about the MI's profession and discloses that she is an eye doctor 10 before he answers. The caveat is that the development might be slower in CMC than face-to-face since there are fewer cues being transmitted. What kind 2 of business would you want to start? There have been a wide range of phenomena studied on different media, and it will not be possible to discuss all of it. How soon people move to a different medium can vary. Relationship advice dating a married man how do i deactivate my tinder account proposed a more nuanced OD model that included phases for choosing a site, deciding on ideal partners, and filtering dating site dating divorced but living under same roof find dating profiles by email free australia people at any point in the interaction phases. The MI uses the message to respond to the previous mutual matching that occurred 1.
I greatly thank David Stern for showing me a way to enjoy an old love for philosophical inquiry and communication scholarship simultaneously. Accordingly, I will view the area of research on CMC and place the above arguments in context. Here is an example 20 : 89 MI: […] I do have to admit i have only read the first 4 harry potter books and 90 have only seen the first 3 movies. With face as the traffic rules of social interaction, there are certain needs that have to be attended to in a conversation. My parents therefore deserve a special thank you. It is possible for someone to give an inappropriate compliment, just as someone can give an inappropriate gag gift. Previously, I defined relationship initiation as umbrella term for first-time and continual social contact. Part of their permission was predicated on my agreement to keep anonymous their website names along with any identifying information of their users. In order to recruit participants, I then sent a mass e-mail message to all members of the University of Iowa research listserv. To meet this standard, I displayed a range of textual data including preceding turns and how people responded and I provided some discussion of how people use website features and their profiles. As scholars of communication, we ought to be interested in every move that goes into the dance of courtship; for communication talks relationships into being Duck, Frehner has found syntactic reduction through the deletion of a subject in e-mail sentences e. Partners are willingly and intentionally interacting with each other. Positive politeness is one possible answer. Just because a user looks at another one's profile, does not necessarily mean that the user is interested in talking. There are three theories in this group including electronic propinquity theory, social influence theory, and channel expansion theory. The advantage to such analysis according to Herring , p. Finally, the cross-modal view suggests that the previous views are mistaken in assuming that writing is meant to be read with our eyes, and speech is meant to be spoken. First, Svennevig studied pre-arranged, non-dating, first-time, face- to-face encounters which are quite distinct from the context of an interaction voluntarily initiated on an OD site.
There has also been a study of romantic rejection online done by Tong and Walther , where they had participants write rejection messages to an online suitor. Overall, the SPS sequence is reflective of offline, face- to-face interactions, while the AAA sequence is reflective of online, asynchronous messaging interactions. Meaning What is context in CMC? Overall, these five openings provide a new way to understand opening lines compared to Kleinke et al. It is possible for someone to give an inappropriate compliment, just as someone can give an inappropriate gag gift. However, she focused exclusively on accounts and no other kinds of facework. Although these theories may seem intuitive, they would later be problematized by interpersonal adaptation and experiential theories. There can be grey areas between familiarity and understanding. Specifically, I looked at how participants opened their conversations, structured them, and how they ended their conversations. Nevertheless, some worry that people might be less polite with the anonymity that the internet affords them. However, these tactics all differ based on the kind of statement the partner makes and the self's own expressed autobiographical circumstances. This comment brings the entire process of courting into relevance by directly asking for its inauguration. Sequential organization Overview In her analysis of arranged first-time interactions between strangers, Svennevig identified a fundamental sequential pattern called the Self-Presentation Sequence [SPS], which is composed of three basic moves. Since OD sites promote relationship initiation, I was interested in how this process occurs between people who message each other on a turn-by-turn level. Such knowledge can lead to an opening like this 32 : 1 MI: Hi there! Although Goffman never gave a fully systematic treatise declaring his view on personal relationships, he often mentioned them in passing. Researchers in Communication have typically analyzed phenomena by breaking them into parts. When a line is grounded, it is making an explicit reference to the profile and asking about it. I'm hoping to be able to 25 teach [Topic] at a college once I'm done.
Instead it applies richness to one's familiarity with the medium and one's partner. Popular Culture. Although people are expected to accept compliments when given, my data show cases where they are rejected. However, it remains to be seen whether that is the case when one looks at turn-by-turn discourse. Consumer Protection and Product Liability. There are how to read message on okcupid girl flirting and then being hard to get fundamental elements that appear: acknowledging, answering, and asking a new question. As Spears, Lea, and Postmes summarized, the earlier theories of CMC confused technical efficiency with social efficiency. When they are treated as whole artifacts, either people respond to the profile as a whole rather than to a particular topic or they mention something about a MR's photo or other non-linguistic features of the profile. After all, what profile authors write differentiates themselves from other members and I assume in this study that people do not message at random. Just because a user looks at another one's profile, does not necessarily mean that the user is interested in talking. With nothing relate to, there is no relationship.
Therefore, the kinds of positive politeness strategies used to initiate a romantic relationship on an OD site, along with the negative facework, are phenomena of interest to this investigation With both politeness strategies, the interlocutors each purports a face and depends on one another to uphold it. This speaks to a person's positive face. But it wasn't only my advisor who helped me. He displays familiarity with the activity by talking about how he visited a textile museum once and his contemplation of spinning yarn out of cat fur Refutative compliments Refutative compliments deny a negative value that a person admits about himself. Consider this asynchronous conversation 2 : 3 MI: I'm doing great. Overall, these theories are more optimistic about relational development via CMC. First, I defined relationship initiation using Goffmanian concepts. Hence, the two uses of the profile have different sequential implications for the conversation. Someone might claim to be from the same hometown, have the same hobbies, or like the same music, too. Fiore et al. Sometimes partners go beyond merely denying a flaw or an attribution and actually spin it to be a positive trait. Overall, warranting theory suggests that we can develop impressions of people online and form relationships through this multi-modality. This statement also backhandedly denies that she is not as smart because of in her inability to keep up with the math. The MR's response gives an acknowledgment of the MI's answer "that's really exciting" , his answer "I am finishing up work on a final paper"… , and his asking a new question about her post-graduate plans Introduction Melissa Ellard, a fashion entrepreneur in Foxborough, Mass. While this dichotomy complicates current understandings of common ground, the idea that people seek some kind of commonality is not new.
One difference between face-to-face and CMC rests less on cues getting filtered out in CMC, and more on the fact that OD introduces its own set of cues and good looking asian guys on tinder just dating site singapore that construct a new context. By discussing some of the research in each domain, contrasts between the CMC and CMD approach will be better exemplified. Since she is disappointed that he has not tried it, she makes an offer to take him there sometime if he is "lucky. Upon acquiring the documents from my participants, I immediately removed any personally online dating flowchart online dating when to send next text after.1st chat information and added line numbers for analytic purposes. Although establishing common ground is a major way of relating, sometimes people project distinction as. First, anchored relationships are marked by our tendency to name them even if conflicting titles arise best popular free dating sites do white women find asian men attractive brothers, spouses, friends. It goes beyond merely recognizing that two people are courting by evaluating the courtship as it has unfolded. From a face perspective, common ground addresses positive face wants; topics that are affirming and non-threatening to a person's desired image. Although Goffman never gave a fully systematic treatise declaring his view on personal relationships, he often mentioned them in passing. That is, social penetration theory requires us to know what people consider to be rewards and costs; a psychological phenomenon. And the target can always rightfully or wrongfully suspect that there is a different reason than the one purported. Hence the bid is accepted overtly by the MI, which establishes alignment. He argues that interpersonal CMC can be more intimate than face-to-face communication. The honesty in the profile: appreciated. This ability to appreciate something that he does not attest to engage in is distal common ground. Similarity moves are not proofs of psychological sameness necessarily. While the interpersonal communication literature recognizes similarity to be a major factor in attraction, there is scant research that uncovers how people establish similarity in conversation. Among many findings, Svennevig reported how the strangers initiated self-presentation sequences, how they introduced new topics into the conversation, how face is managed, and how people find common ground.
While one answer might be that the interlocutors avoid face-threats, the next step is discovering what conditions they create to bypass. Electronic propinquity theory Korzenny, suggests that communicators can experience propinquity psychological closeness through an electronic medium. These theories include social presence theory, the lack of social cues context hypothesis, media richness theory, social identity model of deindividuation effects How to talk to singles online free dating portsmouth ukand signaling theory. To better understand what is going on in online messaging interactions, I first explored the kinds of facework strategies people might use to help maintain, build, or protect face. The MI later responds by saying that she is alright with "cheesy lines," it is just ones that are "skeezy" 52 that she does not like. Herring describes computer-mediated discourse [CMD] as a collection of methods drawn from linguistics, anthropology, communication, and rhetoric to analyze talk on computer- mediated communication. Unsolicited self-presentation is adequation that is not called for by the conversation partner. Like electronic propinquity theory, this theory places richness away from inherent properties of the medium. As people conduct their conversations, they may use process alignments to discuss the AAA sequence as some of my findings showed. Because online daters want to eventually meet face-to-face to determine if there is physical chemistry and attraction, the site is merely used as an initial screening tool to find someone worth getting to know in an offline context. Such labor may have an girls messaging guys first on tinder free speed dating san antonio on whether they have a future conversation and a relationship. Relationship initiation research needs more naturally occurring interactions, facework needs discursive studies, and OD research needs more emphasis on messaging. Sometimes, there is a mutual match where both users indicate interest in icy men attract women japanese dating for free. So it looks like we have something in 34 common with IT support besides movies. This endeavor requires examining actual records of interaction at a turn-by-turn level.
I sought to understand how people do facework for each other, themselves, and how they maintain the interaction as a whole. He argues that interpersonal CMC can be more intimate than face-to-face communication. In their content analysis of compliments, Wolfson and Manes argue that the majority of them tend to use one of five common adjectives nice, good, beautiful, pretty, and great. By discussing some of the research in each domain, contrasts between the CMC and CMD approach will be better exemplified. So, I see you're getting your degree in 9 Chemistry a really low point for me in high school to be honest lol. In her study of students' text messages, Tannen found that females often add extra unnecessary letters "heyyy" as a marker of their femininity or enthusiasm which highlights the writing aspect of texting. Moreover, the willingness to admit a flaw functions as a trust-building measure. Locher argues that the study of politeness in CMC is important because the medium enables us to see the negotiation of norms firsthand and how they are tied to the construction of identity. It is pivotal to my findings on the use of the website and process alignments. Taking a social constructivist approach, this theory argues that people's social networks have the most influence on their perception of the richness of the medium. Thus, by observing facework in the context of relationship initiation, we can see how interlocutors successfully or unsuccessfully work through face threats introduced by the interlocutor or the situation inherently.
Although I was not always the most socially proactive among them, they reached out to me anyway. Hence, users may not ask each other for biographical information as done in the first- move of the SPS but instead point-out common biographical facts seen via the profile. While Walther acknowledges that the formal theory of social presence may be dead, he says "the concept of social presence as an inherent consequence of multiple cues remains alive and well" p. Instead of focusing on what two people mutually believe which is psychological in nature , my focus is on what people two people are mutually able to talk about in a non-face threatening manner which is communicative in nature. When looking at CMD research as a whole, Androstopolous describes the research coming in three chronological waves. As people converse, certain topics are explored, others are avoided once the potential for disagreement is at stake. When agreement happens, a person claims to have the same opinion or value judgment about something. Nevertheless, I would have never been a TA nor a graduate student at Iowa without the unforgettable mentorship that Dr. If we take eternity to mean not infinite temporal duration but timelessness, then eternal life belongs to those who live in the present. This section will survey the three major theoretical camps identified by Walther
I have one brother and one sister. An example is 21 : 1 MI: Couldn't ring more true! For example, Jacobs and Garcia studied conversational repair in chat room interactions. We would not say that her wearing a necklace was a first-turn conversationally. Both of these cases involve using conversation by responding to what the POI has directly stated. This alignment is a positive or negative evaluation of how the interaction and the courting has "progressed" so far. While these are interesting phenomena to understand, the relationship initiation process begins with the conversation. Both give unelaborated answers to the question and reciprocate coffee meets bagel rematch free dating site for flirt in usa. Second, there is the self-presentation answer which can be minimal or expanded. When looking at CMD research as a whole, Androstopolous describes the research coming in three chronological waves. Process alignments In relationship initiation, people do not just get to know each other; they periodically make statements about this acquaintance process. A major question is whether textual computer-mediated communication should be treated as writing or speech. I appreciate Dave Hingstman for his service and the great south asian interracial dating how to get horny girls whenever I stopped by his office.
Or 13 just looking forward to the summer break?! As a discourse analyst, I am giving an interpretation local singles chat line best free app for polyamory dating sites the text informed by the context and relevant academic literature. On a bus or public transport, a stranger might sit close to the POI, overhear the POI's conversation with a fellow passenger, and "jump in" when an opportune topic is mentioned. Scammers, meanwhile, are using dating sites to extract money from vulnerable targets, and some dating-site users advise caution about maintaining personal safety. It is pivotal to my findings on the use of the website and process alignments. So it looks like we have something in 34 common with IT support besides movies. Theories of interpersonal adaptation and exploitation of media The last set of theories identified by Walther agree that relating is possible through CMC by users adapting to the cue limitations to either equivalent or greater affiliation levels. Previously, I defined relationship initiation as umbrella term for first-time and continual social contact. In any case, like face-to-face interaction, CMC naturally provides an opportunity for girl puts phone down pants flirt how to attract 18 year old women politeness and flaming, depending on the flow of the interaction.
Herring describes computer-mediated discourse [CMD] as a collection of methods drawn from linguistics, anthropology, communication, and rhetoric to analyze talk on computer- mediated communication. I do not 54 recommend that opening line. Ultimately, this review will show that neither approach to CMC research addresses the key issues of how people initiate relationships online and do facework. Ultimately, each of the conversations had unique aspects; there is no formula provided here to predict how a conversation will take shape. Furthermore, 20 participants reported not developing any kind of close relationship with their conversation partners, while 10 did. After uploading the documents, participants answered 15 open and close-ended survey questions to provide background to their conversations e. Click here to sign up. Ethical considerations and practical limitations also exist. Music choices, 3 check. Nevertheless, the analyst should provide a defensible interpretation and analysis to the readers. While it led to many accolades and state titles, the most important thing he gave me was a sense of purpose in life. Using the profile There are two ways that profiles are used by the MI in opening lines; as whole artifacts or as first-turns in a conversation. Interaction The interaction domain discusses issues with conversational procedure such as turn sequences or topic development, which is usually of interest to conversation analysts and ethnomethodologists. I have three goals with this dissertation. Unlike the interpersonal tradition that attempts to answer this through psychological theories of message processing, the CMD looks to interaction maneuvers and procedures. Relationship initiation research needs more naturally occurring interactions, facework needs discursive studies, and OD research needs more emphasis on messaging. Pace is shown through the personal or impersonal nature of the topics or moves made such as invitations to meet.
One question that researchers investigate is how users in CMD are able to make their conversations work with all of the potential disruptions and difficulties that come with an online medium. Svennevig argues that the SPS sequence is used to initiate a new topic, elicit personal information, or for turn allocation. For example, writing is separated from time and space, speech is in real-time; writing has more complex, highly structured format, speech has a more simple, loosely structured format. In other instances, people exchange phone numbers or plan to meet much later in the conversation 32 : MI: I used to not like country music, but some of it has grown on me. So it looks like we have something in 34 common with IT support besides movies. Herring provides a faceted classification scheme for both medium and social factors. The findings that I have selected to report in the next chapter work together to provide systematic understandings of how facework happens in the context of online relationship initiation. Nevertheless, those projects would only show what people think they want and not what they actually do in the heat of the conversation moment. Baron addresses this question by discussing three main views on linguistic representation; dichotomous, spectral, and cross-modal. For my purposes, it is necessary only to review two major research traditions. Recently, Whitty has proposed five general phases of OD: attention writing the profile , recognition sending the first message , interaction talking and flirting , meeting face-to-face offline , and resolution deciding interest or not. Nevertheless, if they agree with each other too much, they can start to become "boring," seem like a "door mat," or appear "fake. These discussions produce rules about what a partner approves happening in an interaction.